“he was meant to hold the roof, instead he became weather.” I relate to this. This is a powerful piece, I love the way you’ve structured it, so creative and clever
Your words are as profound as the format you’ve chosen based on your profession. A brilliant idea expressed so beautifully. Sorry for the weight you were exposed to, but you were obviously made of special materials that held through the fiercest storms.
Sam! This was incredibly impactful! Though I am not familiar with the work of building design, the use of this format made evident what those specifications were the building of your life. One would wonder how that structure could stand given all that was not met, yet we see how experiences reinforced the strength of the final structure. That which was being built had necessity to become its own builder. Oof..."nothing hit hard enough to make it fall."
How we stand (survive), when our childhoods are constructed this way, is quite miraculous.
This brought me back to a poem I read in my Modern American Lit class called Naming of Parts (Henry Reed), and that is one of the biggest compliments that I can give you, because that was half a lifetime ago, and verses of that poem have echoed in my head from time to time over all of these years because it had so struck me.
Funny enough, he was British, not American. Lucky for me my professor was wont to wandering from the syllabus to expose us to whatever seemed relevant on a given day.
I really appreciate what you’ve done here, Sam. You’ve taken such intense emotion and have given it a shape that lets your reader be there with you, but in a way that feels safe. You’ve also made a lot of space for us to have our own emotions and associations and memories alongside yours.
I want to add my voice to those who enjoyed this. To me the form greatly enhanced the poem; I was impressed with how well it lent itself to the hard things you were talking about. It gave an emotional distance to the hard things that made it easy to say: yes, I know, that's the impact of the holder of the roof becoming the weather.
This is SO GOOD, Sam. I love the structure, and definitely felt it enhances the poem. Giving it a container like this allows you to talk about some very hard things without it becoming "things you should talk about with your therapist".
Loved this, Sam. Really inventive. Last year I wrote a poem in the format of a menu: Ingredients, Method (numbered), Cooking notes. This kind of thing can be fun - and incredibly liberating.
Hi Sam. The words resonate and are very powerful but the structure didn’t work for me. I found it distracting and did not flow the way your other poems do. It could just be the way my mind works. 🩵
I certainly get it, Grace. And thank you for the honest feedback. I may tinker with it at some point to see if it still carries the same weight with a typical poetic form.
This poem is so powerful and resonant, Sam! The way that the form supports the central metaphor is brilliant, and it lends so much to the impact of the poem.
“he was meant to hold the roof, instead he became weather.” I relate to this. This is a powerful piece, I love the way you’ve structured it, so creative and clever
Thank you, Alex! I appreciate it. 🙏
Great line.
Thank you, Bethany! 🙏
Your words are as profound as the format you’ve chosen based on your profession. A brilliant idea expressed so beautifully. Sorry for the weight you were exposed to, but you were obviously made of special materials that held through the fiercest storms.
Thank you! I appreciate the time you spent with my words. 🙏
My pleasure Sam.
Sam! This was incredibly impactful! Though I am not familiar with the work of building design, the use of this format made evident what those specifications were the building of your life. One would wonder how that structure could stand given all that was not met, yet we see how experiences reinforced the strength of the final structure. That which was being built had necessity to become its own builder. Oof..."nothing hit hard enough to make it fall."
How we stand (survive), when our childhoods are constructed this way, is quite miraculous.
Powerful piece. Well done!
Blessings and MUCH LOVE. ~Wendy💜
Thank you, Wendy. I appreciate your presence here. 🙏
This brought me back to a poem I read in my Modern American Lit class called Naming of Parts (Henry Reed), and that is one of the biggest compliments that I can give you, because that was half a lifetime ago, and verses of that poem have echoed in my head from time to time over all of these years because it had so struck me.
Thank you so much, Christa! I appreciate the note. Truly. I hadn't heard of Henry Reed, but will definitely look him up. 🙏
Funny enough, he was British, not American. Lucky for me my professor was wont to wandering from the syllabus to expose us to whatever seemed relevant on a given day.
I really appreciate what you’ve done here, Sam. You’ve taken such intense emotion and have given it a shape that lets your reader be there with you, but in a way that feels safe. You’ve also made a lot of space for us to have our own emotions and associations and memories alongside yours.
"in a way that feels safe." I hadn't thought about this, and I'm glad you mentioned. Thank you, Ann! 🙏
I like you use if personification here. Also, this is a nice philosophical piece
Thank you, Kiki! 🙏
Powerful work, Sam. I admire your bravery, integrity and craft in such deep emotional territory 🙌
Thank you, my friend! 🙏❤️
I want to add my voice to those who enjoyed this. To me the form greatly enhanced the poem; I was impressed with how well it lent itself to the hard things you were talking about. It gave an emotional distance to the hard things that made it easy to say: yes, I know, that's the impact of the holder of the roof becoming the weather.
Thank you, Trish! 🙏
What an interesting and unique structure. Very powerful.
The form has brought out something truly special and powerful. The form amplifies rather thsn constricts the words.
Thank you, Laura! I was hoping it would. 🙏
Brilliant, Sam! Love this structure.
Thank you, Nora! 🙏
This is SO GOOD, Sam. I love the structure, and definitely felt it enhances the poem. Giving it a container like this allows you to talk about some very hard things without it becoming "things you should talk about with your therapist".
Thank you, Sarah. The poem held its structure in draft mode, but the moment I went to publish it, the structure fell apart. Hence the second photo.
I think the form works really well. It's concrete and gives a structure for emotion and experience without being overly technical.
Thank you, MK! 🙏
Loved this, Sam. Really inventive. Last year I wrote a poem in the format of a menu: Ingredients, Method (numbered), Cooking notes. This kind of thing can be fun - and incredibly liberating.
Thanks, Ian! I've tried the recipe poems in the past, and they usually haven't gone my way, but I do enjoy them
Hi Sam. The words resonate and are very powerful but the structure didn’t work for me. I found it distracting and did not flow the way your other poems do. It could just be the way my mind works. 🩵
I certainly get it, Grace. And thank you for the honest feedback. I may tinker with it at some point to see if it still carries the same weight with a typical poetic form.
This poem is so powerful and resonant, Sam! The way that the form supports the central metaphor is brilliant, and it lends so much to the impact of the poem.
Thank you, Jenna! 🙏